52 Weeks of 2014 - Week 13

As I look back on our last few years, there are many things I could focus on. We made the choice after our first child, our son was born, for me to stop my job outside the home and be with our children. To be honest, I didn't really feel like it was a choice to be made, I couldn't handle the thought of leaving them. I know people do; some feel they have no other option, some absolutely love their jobs and have worked hard to get where they are and I do not judge them, but I wanted, more than anything to be there for my kids.

I had some pretty great jobs, that I really enjoyed with people that I looked forward to seeing every day, but this...this job of being a mother has and is, by far the most important. We could financially be in a much stronger position if I had kept working, but we have three amazing, beautiful children, who deserved to be loved and taught by us. Who needed to know they were important and they were worth spending time with and being with.

There is school now and there are friends and they are starting to experience life, but I hope that basic values we have instilled, foundations we helped to build will remain strong. We will continue to sow into them as much as we can and encourage and inspire, but it is no longer just us influencing them.

I do not regret for one moment the sacrifices we have made. I would go back and do it all over again. This is the most important job in the whole world.

52 Weeks of 2014 - Week 6

And then the rain came and it wasn't just a soft rain, it poured! The kind of weather that most definitely made me want to be indoors, wrapped up warm (wishing I had a fireplace). When you're a kid though, what could be more fun than to splash in puddles?

52 Weeks of 2014 - Week 5

They grow up so quickly, but watching them sleep takes me back in time. I can see them, once again, as they looked as babies. It is an amazing thing.

This one is, of course, way past needing naps, but after a couple of very late nights last weekend, when forced to be quiet and still she actually fell asleep. I know she needed it. I watched her as she snoozed, so pretty and peaceful and I marveled at the girl she was and is becoming.

Such hopes and dreams we have for our children, that they will be children for as long as possible, that they will grow into confident and strong adults.  The years we fully have with them are so short and precious. I hope we grow to be great friends, moving beyond the parent daughter roles we have today. I hope she will always know she is loved and beautiful. I hope she will speak her mind, even when she disagrees with others and not be afraid to be different. I hope she will take risks and laugh at her mistakes and try again.

I know that she truly has the ability to move mountains, not only in her life but in the lives of others and I hope that she will believe that for herself and be an encouragement to others.

I love this sweet (and spicy) girl!

52 Weeks of 2014 - Week 3

Last week I accompanied my daughter's kindergarten class on a field trip to the Lawrence Hall of Science, in Berkeley. It was so great. Their group had a 'Fizz, Pop, Wow!' science class where they learned about mixing different ingredients and watching reactions, observing the properties of solids, liquids and gases. Then they got to explore the main halls, full of exhibits and hands-on displays. It really was a place that showed how fun learning can be. The groans when it was time to leave, were heartfelt and everybody agreed that the time had been too short.

It is so wonderful to see children's eyes light up as they learn and get excited at discoveries they make for themselves. The joy of understanding something new and feeling empowered. If you live in the Bay Area and haven't already visited, I would thoroughly recommend it.

52 Weeks of 2013 - Week 45

Childhood is so fleeting. Before we know it, those helpless babies are crawling, walking, then all too quickly running. The cries become words then sentences and all of a sudden there are full, two-way conversations. Time speeds by and we cannot stop it, try as we might.

A little girl was feeling sad this day. Her older brother and sister and cousins had taken off without her, up a steep, loose gravel hill and try as hard as she could, she was unable to follow them. She sat forlornly, fighting back the tears and I felt a little helpless. Had I not been wearing flip flops, or had two dogs in tow, I may have attempted to make the treacherous climb with her, but given those circumstances, it was not an option. I know she loves me, but in that moment she would rather have been exploring with the big kids, than hanging out with her Mom.

She didn't want consoling, she was trying to be strong! I know these instances are growing further apart and happening with lesser frequency. All too soon they'll all be off having their own fun, as I watch (and cheer) from the sidelines. That moment, was one more for me to just be with her, to turn the sad into a smile, to create something special, for just the two of us. So we went on a little treasure hunt, searching for conkers. It was our own little adventure and she was so proud. I guess 'conkers' isn't really played over here, but she knew exactly what I was talking about, she'd seen it on a Kipper episode. She was excited and happy...and so was I.

As mothers, our role is constantly changing. We go from being the be all and end all, to a helper, a teacher, an encourager, having finally to release, to be a cheerleader and supporter and hopefully in the end a friend. Each stage so far has been so sweet and as I see my role needing to change it continues to be bittersweet, but I hope to cherish each one and to keep depositing into those memory banks.