Mmmm

If you know me, you know that I have a sweet tooth and I love to bake. Last week I found a link to this recipe for Fudge Revel Bars and decided they would be the perfect treat to make for Father's Day. I thought I would share it with you here as I think they turned out really well. Just be warned, this makes a whole cookie sheet's worth.

Fudge Revel Bars
1 cup butter
2 eggs
2 cups brown sugar
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
2 1/2 cups flour
2 tsp vanilla
3 cups oats

Fudgey Layer
1 (14oz) can sweetened condensed milk
1 pckg chocolate chips
1 tbsp butter
1/2 tsp salt

Cream together the butter, brown sugar and eggs. Add the vanilla, salt, baking soda and flour and mix well. Add the oats and mix well. Press 2/3 of the mixture into a pre-greased cookie sheet.

(My little tip here is to spread it as well as you can, then cut a piece of wax paper lay it on top of the mixture and use your hands to apply a smoothing pressure and continue pressing down the mixture until it fills the pan and reaches all the edges. When you are done, you can carefully lift the wax paper, your hands are not greasy and the mixture should not stick to the wax paper).

To prepare the fudge layer, put the all of the fudge ingredients into a microwave safe bowl, microwave for one minute, then stir. Keep cooking at 30 second increments, stirring, until the mixture has all melted together. Pour over the dough and spread over the complete surface. 'Sprinkle' the rest of the dough over the fudge (I used two spoons to scoop up the dough and place it somewhat randomly on top).

Bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes.

Let them cool (for as long as you can stand...it might be hard) and enjoy with a glass of milk!

Happy Father's Day!

How does one describe a Father? I know there are many examples all around us and, unfortunately, some of those are far from inspiring. Yet it is such a vitally important role. I see my children and the love they have for their Daddy. He loves them unconditionally, he wants the very best for them, he has sacrificed for them and prayed for them, he encourages them and teaches them, he is present, he is there for them!

Nobody is perfect and I am sure as we reflect on our own childhood, where parents who loved us just as much, still made mistakes, we sometimes wonder what our children will think of the job that we do. When they are parents themselves, then they will of course understand. We love our children, we do what we honestly feel is best and we trust God to take care of the rest.

There are times of exhaustion but also of pride and pure joy. What is better than to see their sweet smiling faces? Sure there are challenges but the rewards far, far outweigh any hardships. To all the fathers out there, do not undervalue the importance of your role in your child's life.To my own father, thank you for the years of friendship.

To my wonderful husband and partner in this parenting journey, thank you for all that you do and all that you are, you continually give above and beyond what most would consider more-than-reasonable and we are eternally grateful. I love you, your children love you, you are amazing!

Happy Father's Day.

52 Week Project - Week 24 {Marin Child Portrait Photographer}

Aaaah summer is in full swing for us. School has been out for three weeks and we have been hiking and playing at parks and going to the beach and meeting with friends. Life is more relaxed and much less structured.

Any time there is water to counteract heat it is a huge bonus, the kids could not be happier. We spent time this week visiting friends and playing in the San Anselmo creek, which my friend's mom's house backs onto. Water, sunshine, shade, friends, snacks...they really make for the best of times.

How is your summer shaping up?

52 Week Project - Week 23

All children should get to experience carefree pleasures that bring simple joy. Blowing dandelions is one of those experiences, that is almost magical. I think I get almost as excited as them, in the same way as blowing bubbles, or the candles on a birthday cake...why is that?

I know that to some they are just an ugly weed, annoying and uncontrollable, but there is something mysterious and alluring about them. The perfect little yellow flower, so bright and happy, which changes into a ball of fluff, strong, yet delicate and irresistible. There is excitement and anticipation as breath is drawn, and then the releasing, of breath and seeds, floating gently away, like parachutes they gently fall, to start a new life. Quite amazing!

Sometimes the simplest things are the most beautiful.

52 Week Project - Week 22

Their first kiss as Mr. and Mrs. (Sigh) I love weddings. I always have and always will. Such a day of excitement and the start of a new life as a married couple. I still remember my own wedding day so clearly and the emotions surrounding it, yet somehow now I am a mother, with three small children and fourteen and a half years behind me, as a wife. It still blows my mind and I feel very blessed and happy.

I snapped this one with a five year old on my lap, not the easiest task, I can assure you. Do not be horrified, I was just a guest not an official photographer this time. Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Botts and many blessings to the two of you for your life ahead.

52 Week Project - Week 21

Well once again I am posting later than I would like. The good news is, that I am keeping up with this project and shooting more as a result. A bit of discipline never hurt anyone. Pretty soon we will be halfway through the year, which is ridiculously crazy to think about.

School is out and I now have three children at home again, so there will be many trips to the park, and if the weather ever gets it's act together again and behaves like summer, trips to the beach! I am waiting anxiously.

52 Week Project - Week 20 {Bay Area Child Portrait Photographer}

Light is not just light. There is harsh light and there is beautiful light, and timing is everything. The first and last hour of sunlight, when the sun is low in the sky, bathing everything in a golden glow...well it can be quite magical. Turn your subject around to back light them and the end result is gorgeous, hazy light wrapping around them.

My sweet mischievous girl gave me a few minutes of her time, which with this light was all I needed, then she was done. I love the results, I love that these photographs capture so much of her personality, the person she is, right now, so fun and full of joy, yet obstinate and stubborn, she is three!

And just because my girl and the light both take my breath away, I have to post a few extras.

52 Week Project - Week 19

I often wonder why children fight sleep, so much. When they are well rested, they (and I must admit, I) are much more pleasant to be around. Plus during those moments of sweet slumber, they look so sweet and angelic that I can forgive all wrongs!

(Excuse the grain, this was a pretty dim room and I had to crank up the ISO.)

52 Week Project - Week 18

I have been so incredibly fortunate to have had the friends I have had in my life. Some of my best friends are flung far and wide across this earth and some are near at hand. In the journey of parenthood I am so grateful for the friends that are on this road with us and that our children are friends with each other...best friends!

My son's two closest friends, who he has grown up with, are both little girls and he could not love them more. I know that they are entering the years when they will, undoubtedly, seek friends of the same sex with the same interests, but I trust that these early foundational years will keep them close. That these will be friends that he will always be able to turn to in times of need, or doubt. The shared memories of growing up together, the deep bonds of trust and love of each others' families. I hope these will always stand strong in his mind, that he will have confidence, knowing he is loved.

How empty our life would be without friends to share it with!

52 Week Project - Week 17

My sweet three year old. She loves her ballet classes and yet this last week she seemed quite detached. Before we had even left the house she was saying that she did not want to dance, she just wanted to watch. Well I told her that she needed to be ready, in case she changed her mind. When we arrived, we found that instead of class being in the main room on the stage, a conference was going on and her class had been moved to a smaller room. This was a first for her and she seemed to become even more uncomfortable.

She was not her usual confident self, she seemed shyer and more reserved and even at one point shed a few tears. It broke my heart a little to see this other side of her, but she came through it.

How often do we take the easy road, the wide road traveled by so many before us? It is the safe route, for sure, but are we really living to our full potential within those confines? Creativity often involves trying something different, or new, and there might be a risk involved.

A tiny spark is all that is needed to start the fire, it does not start as a raging furnace. Maybe, in order for our wildest dreams to become reality we just need to take that first tiny step.

52 Week Project - Week 16

Just a very simple one from last week. My children constantly remind me that I over-complicate things, even life. There are chores and responsibilities and to-do lists and the reality is that they are never ending. There are always things to worry about. Where are my priorities? Where is the joy?

Children want to have fun! They know how to have fun, they can turn the park that they have been to one thousand times into a fun adventure. Life is simple and sweet (as long as mom is not nagging them to tidy their toys or clothes again!)

I am so glad they have each other, I am so glad that they have this time to be children, to enjoy the world around them, without having to constantly rely on TV or electronic equipment to keep them entertained. I want to protect this short window of time for them, to allow them to not be overly-scheduled, to let them play and be...kids.

Yes there is training and preparing for the life ahead of them, and responsibilities to learn. They live in a different age than we grew up in, with a whole new world of pressures we never knew, but this still should be a time of freedom and fun.

52 Week Project - Week 15 {Bay Area Child Portrait Photographer}

I love the relationship my kids have with each other. They truly enjoy each other and have fun together. The girls really are each others best friend and the time they have spent together since their brother started school has only served to strengthen their bond.

Yesterday I made a new dress for Bryttain - a pillowcase dress. I have been looking for something simple and classic, for the longest time and it just has not materialized, so I decided I would just have to make it. I ran to a local thrift store and found one pillowcase that would work, ran to Michaels for some ribbon to make the ties and an hour later she had a cute dress, perfect for a little shoot. She was pretty excited and all of a sudden all three of them were excited. We were losing light rapidly but they were insistent! Arran (kind of) helped me drag my bench out into the field and I just started shooting.

I love to catch them interacting and this fun stage of their relationship. I know that in the years ahead they may not always be this close, but I will have proof that they were and I know in my heart that they will always have an undeniable bond, that I hope will come full circle.

Love the natural outtakes too.

Of course we have to have some fun too, we cannot be all serious when it comes to photographs, otherwise how many do you think I would really get? Love, love, love these little people!

52 Week Project - Week 14

We, or maybe I should own it and say "I", can be my own worst critic. We so easily see our flaws, the places where we are far from perfect. We see ourselves as nobody else can, because we are the only ones to know the internal dialogues, the struggles that we hide from the rest of the world.

I am on a journey. I want to be able to see myself as I was truly created to be. I want to humbly be able to recognize my areas of strength, my talents, the gifts that I have been given, the things that make me unique and different from everybody else...from every other photographer out there.

When my children look at me they see my heart! They know that I love them, and will fight for them to the end. They see my loyalty and that I truly want the best for them. They see that I am beautiful and fun and creative. They see me at my worst and my best, the highs and the lows...and they love me. Their little eyes see ME! They are a gift to me and teach me new things each day, I want to be better for them and for that to impact everyone that I come in contact with.

This past weekend I 'attended' a live, online photography class. If you are a photographer, or aspiring photographer, I encourage you to check out Creative Live, it is such an amazing resource. They provide free classes, as long as the timing works with your schedule and you can attend the live event. If that does not work, then you can buy the class after the fact, to watch at your convenience. There are many workshops out there, but they cost a small fortune; through Creative Live you can have access to amazing teachers for a fraction of the cost.

This weekend's course encouraged more searching of myself and challenged me to be prepared to take risks, to try...and do things 'wrong', because in that process I might find the 'right' way to do something.  To try to let go of my perfectionism, because all that does is encourage me to procrastinate. None of us will ever be perfect - yet how many of us strive for that, or to appear to be that? To think about what makes me different and use that to my advantage.

Take a moment to step back and see yourself as someone who loves you sees you...you might be pleasantly surprised!

Howards' Sneak Peek {Bay Area Newborn Photographer}

Do not be fooled by the photo above...this sweet thing did not sleep a wink during her little shoot! I guess I was just far too interesting.

Ah sweet newborns. A brand new, tiny person, with their whole life ahead of them. Sometimes it is hard to believe that we all started out that way. Little Miss 'S' has such delicate features with the most perfect girly nose. She was incredibly alert and gave me great eye contact and even some faint smiles. What a treasure.

Congratulations again to the Howard family, another beautiful little girl to bring joy and laughter to your household. Enjoy every moment (in spite of the sleepless nights) these are the best days of our lives!

52 Week Project - Week 13

A little late posting this one; the recovery from international travel with children, was harder than anticipated. I blame it on a certain three year old and her body clock, whose schedule dictated how we got to recover from the jetlag.

52 Week Project - Week 12

We are still in England, and in honour (yes with the English spelling) of Lou, it had to be an Audrey Hepburn quote which I felt suited them perfectly.

We stayed a few days last week with my brother Wesley and his lovely girlfriend Lou, Wesley of course was very excited to get to have photographs taken. He was not in the least bit worried about what neighbours might think, or sitting on the ground. He was perfectly relaxed and enjoyed the experience thoroughly! Believe that if you will! What is it about guys?

Just because I can...here are a few extra.

52 Week Project - Week 11

We are currently in the UK for a family vacation. Coming 'home' does not always feel like a vacation, it can be hard work, with family to visit and much driving to be done. But we started in London and pretended to be tourists, showing my children some of the sights. I have been in awe of the buildings, the attention to detail and just how beautiful they are. I do not normally think buildings are beautiful but I have seen with fresh eyes.

My picture for week 11 is the dome of St. Paul's Cathedral, where Prince Charles and Lady Diana were married. It is 'a symbol of the hope, resilience and strength of the city and nation it serves. Above all, St Paul’s Cathedral is a lasting monument to the glory of God.'

And just because I have been busy with my camera, a few more:

 

52 Week Project - Week 10

Thrilled to finally be able to blow bubbles on a consistent basis.

52 week project

There will unfortunately be a delay posting the next few weeks' photos. We are currently in England and I brought my laptop so that I could still download and edit photographs, but last night, part of a cup of tea spilled on my laptop and today it does not seem to be working. I am sad and frustrated and praying for a miracle!

52 Week Project - Week 9

My little girl turned five this week. It is so bittersweet to watch our children grow. More often than not I wish I could stop time and keep them as these sweet children, yet with each new accomplishment I burst with pride at who they are becoming. I cannot stop time, no-one can, and this is one of the many reasons I love photography. All the little details that I could not possibly remember, probably even by next week, can at least be captured and looked back on again and again.

Before I had children I did not fully understand how precious each and every moment was. Our life, our time is a gift, not to be squandered. That minute, hour, day, week that has passed, we will never have it back again, it is gone forever. Let's make it all count.

52 Week Project - Week 8

 
A four year old does not worry about how she looks, comparing herself to her friends, wondering if she is tall enough, or thin enough. A four year old enjoys life. She dances because it makes her feel pretty and it is fun. She wears the most enchanting dress, just to play at home. She knows she is beautiful and nobody has told her otherwise.

She is stunning and I pray that she will always know that. That the pressures and cares of this world will not cause her to conform. That we will be able to protect and nurture her self-esteem for as long as possible. That we could build a firm foundation before outside influences can infiltrate with lies that destroy joy, as weeds choking the most delicate of flowers.

If only we could all find that little girl inside of us, unhindered and uninhibited. Then we too could find true beauty!

52 Week Project - Week 7

Our weather has been a little crazy. We have had glorious sun-filled, warm days (far too early I know) and more recently the gray...the rain. I groan a little inwardly when I awake to the pitter patter on my windowpane. The days just seem harder and duller. I know we need the rain, but I miss the sunshine! It lifts my spirits, it brings forth life. All around I see the beautiful signs that comfortingly remind me, season follows season, that spring soon WILL be here.

52 Week Project - Week 6

52 Week Project - Week 5

It is such a strange thought to me, that in just a few short months she will be the only one at home with me all of the time. My sweet girl has changed so much since turning three in December and one aspect that I have really noticed, is her new desire for independent play. Sure she loves to play with her older brother and sister, but she is also loving her own little world of her imagination.

I love the vivid imagination that each of my children has, their ability to play and entertain themselves without the constant need for television or computer games. Neither of those is banned from our house, but they are used in moderation with limits. I would so much rather they just play and have fun and just get to be kids. This time in their lives is so short lived, so important, so foundational and we can never gain it back again.

This playing is their work, it is serious business...just look at the concentration on her face and her little tongue. Love, love, love this little girl and the person she is becoming.

52 Week Project - Week 4

Last week James and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary. It is hard to remember the details of life before 'us'. That was such a long time ago, another life. Yet at the same time it has been the blink of an eye and here we are, three children later; a family.

There is no way I could imagine being at this place in life with anybody else; the thought of losing him, for any reason, would be beyond devastating. No other man could possibly love me as he does, adore me and put up with me so patiently. He makes me laugh, he is not afraid to show his emotions, he is intelligent and creative and I know that I can trust him. He is my partner in this life, the most wonderful husband and sweetest father.

We were meant to be. Our love is true. He truly is a gift from God, to me.

52 Week Project - Week 3

I continue to be amazed by how much my mood improves with the appearance of the sun. It has been a wonderful week, with more opportunities to spend time outdoors. One of the days as I was looking for inspiration, I glanced in the field behind our house and it literally sparkled. It was actually mid afternoon, not early morning, as you might expect, yet tiny water droplets were still clinging to the blades of grass and reflecting the sunlight. How often we miss these simple mysteries, busy with our everyday lives. That day I stopped and drank it in and smiled...before running inside to grab my camera.

I love how this project forces me to look around, with a new perspective. We are surrounded by so much simple beauty and it is the most amazing gift that we should not take for granted. I hope that I can continue to slow down life and really see all that is around me. I encourage you to do the same.

52 Week Project - Week 2

This beautiful child does nothing by halves. She feels things so deeply, whatever it be from frustration or anger to joy, humor or excitement, it is without restraint. It is a trait she most certainly inherited from her Father, who is a man of passion.

The negative emotions can be hard to deal with, of course, but when she laughs it is hard not to laugh with her. There is something so real and so raw about laughter that is refreshing and contagious. Her days are most certainly not wasted as she brings joy to our household. What a gift!

Help on the journey.

In my photography journey, the internet has been an invaluable tool for learning and inspiration; without it my photography would not be where it is today. I joined a photography forum and there are numerous blogs I frequent as well as Google, when I need to find a specific tutorial or help with editing (which these days, is a huge part of photography).

I already mentioned The Creative Mama Blog as they are doing a 52 week photography challenge, with bi-weekly themes and another one I am following along with and who are providing weekly themes, is MCP Actions. Their theme this week was 'Around the House' and their week runs Saturday-Friday.

Well we got to Friday afternoon (this first week was a shorter week) and I suddenly realized that I had yet to take and submit my photograph. I was kind of lost for what to shoot, it was late in the afternoon and a dreary day, so lighting was horrible and my house (not unusual) was a mess. I decided to reach for my macro lens, which enables me to take great close-up detail shots (thereby minimizing seeing surrounding mess ;P ). I shot a couple of different things; a plate of feathers I had bought at Michaels, details of carving in my new wood bench, before I walked into the bedroom and saw my open jewelry case with necklaces hanging innocently enough.

Anyway, just thought I would share the photo I chose for this theme. Next week's theme is 'Illustrate a Song', I will have to get my thinking cap on for that!

52 Week Project - Week 1

So every Christmas, my lovely sister spends her hard earned cash and flies over from freezing England to visit us, in...very cold California. It really is not much better here at this time of year, yes we, unfortunately, have winters too. She could go somewhere hot, but instead she chooses to spend time with family. She spoils her nephew and nieces, she lets my husband and I get a night away without the kids, she hangs out with us and puts up with us. It is fun for me to have somebody to shop with, it is fun for the kids to have someone else paying them close attention and showing them love, in the way only family does.

She is kind and generous. She is beautiful, inside and, obviously, out. She is loyal, she has good taste. She is honest and she cares about others. She has so much to give and would make someone an amazing wife, although she says she has finally reached the place where she can be happy being single. She makes me laugh. She listens to me, like only a sister can...she jabs at me, like only a sister can! I cannot say enough good things about her and miss her already.

Of course with as willing a model as she was, although that is my official selection for the 52 week project, I have to share a few more.

This one was a close contender for the 1/52 place.

 Don't forget to check back by next Friday for the second week of this project and if you decide to do something similar leave me a comment so I can follow along with you too.

 One down, fifty one to go!